Does talent has any place in Government Job?

That's a long debate. I'm in a profession where so many employees of government department come in my contact. I observe them a lot of times. It was yesterdays incident that brought me to write this blog. A Government Official came to my office for his work with two three files. I asked him to give me a particular certificate related with his office. About half an hour, he was looking into his files. No response. I was seeing that particular certificate in his file clearly but he was not able to identify it at all even when it was clearly written on it. What a mess, he stood-up and went back to his office telling me that I will come tomorrow with the certificate. I'm still fully assured that he is not comming today or any other day. What does that mean? Who the hell is that guy who interviewed him and posted him for this job. What kind of qualities do the employers require in such persons? In such way, what is the possibility of the speed of India's development.
When I go the the government offices, I see 90% of the employees are engaged in only preparing Pay-bills. Each and every time whenever I see, they only discuss about their pay and other benefits. What about the purpose for which they have been employed and appointed? Does talent and specialities are not the requirements for government jobs. Each and every employee I see is having knowledge problem. He does not know how to do a particular kind of work or if he knows, there is only one way he is known to it and that is, how his predecessor does it. Nothing special understanding is required to do it. What kind of tests are they undergo? I think, such number of employees are possibly responsible for the slow development of our country. Dont know the way of work, dont understand how to manage their work, dont want to act specially in completing a particular work. When it comes to deadline of a particular work, it is totally embarassing and freaky that even then they do the work at their natural speed and no special attention is given. The reason is amazing - We are government employees, we have lot of problems, lot of work, we dont have the necessary manforce and last but not the least and the most freakiest answer - Well, the deadline may be postponed afterall we are government office, if any mistake occurse, there is no one to impose any kind of penalty on us. For god sake, who will make them believe that being a government employee you should work more faster as you are more responsible for the development of our country. God help them out and give some brain.

A Father Whose Son Doesn't Recognise Him

This November, my son will be of two years age. How sweet son I have. He is very cute, lovely, talented, gorgeous - what even if he doesnt what the word "Pappa" means. I used to play with him. I remember him screaming to come with me whenever I'm going to office. I always wanted to see the smile on his face when in the evening I used to come at home. He would leave all the toys, the things he's playing with, whenever he see me. Just wanted to come to me. In the morning, when he awakes, starts searching for me. I used to keep him in my hands and show all the photographs of god, he used to say "Jay". Then we used to start playing. Always wanted to be feed by me and not his mother. Instead of learning how to say "Mummy" or "Aai", he learnt the word "Pappa". It was so complimentary and proud for me whenever he used to call me "Pappa". My little प्यारासा , छोटासा , बिट्टू . Whenever I feed him, used to eat all the things. I was totally flattered whenever someone sees him in my hands. I used to take him out with me. Once, he was very dangerously ill. I was used to remain all day with him, well it was my duty. Still, he was more loving towards me than his mother. In the evening whenever I come from office, used to play with me till the night. I remember, he never go to sleep, he loved to play with me so much that eventhough I see his sleepy eyes, but still he wanted to play with me. and then I used to sing song for him so that he go to sleep. He used to sing with me eventhogh there were no words he can speak, but still he would make sounds like how I'm singing. Without my singing, he would not at all go to sleep. I remember. He was totally into me. May be, this is what kind of love he wanted from me. My wife always said, he always calls you as "Pappa", dont call me "Mummy". Well, really, he might definitely have more love for me. I also love him a lot, lots more than anything.
BUT, now the time is different - Once I went to meet my wife at her father's home, I saw my son, after about 4 months, he was very sweet, cute. I took him in my hands, suddenly my eyes were totally wet. I broke down. I kissed him so much. He was not feeling comfirtable at me. Screaming for his mother. May be he was feeling who's this guy holding me tight. She again kept him and made him ralaxed. He suddenly called me "Uncle". Just like any other person. What else one could suffer, your own son calling you "Uncle", the one who can not live without you, doesnt even remember you. Well, now also he is not with me. It's been long time, around 8 months, I'm living without my life, my wife and my son. What blessings my wife's father could be getting from god by keeping us apart. Every day, I miss them, Every night I cry for them. But her father has totally washed her mind, tought so much bad things about me and my family. She also believes in him and does not even call me or message me. What a pity! I'm totally broken, not having my loving wife and sweet son with me.

May god bless my son and my wife with all the happiness and joy.

The Imaginary Love and Real Life

Once I heard a move dialogue, "Instead of loving a person whom you love, Love the person who loves you". It has a great meaning, you know. The person to you love, will not necessarily love or love you with some kind of needs, but if a person loves you then that one will definitely love you from the bottom of his heart and his love will not depend on what kind of his needs are you completing or providing. Yes, I messed with this one. I tried loving her so much but didnt got the clue that she loves her needs and nothing else and if out of 100 needs, I'm not providing only the single need, eventhough the 99 have been met, will keep saying "You dont love me at all". What is the reason? Clearly, she loves her needs and not me. Yes. For example, I she has told me to bring one tomato, one lemon, one ginger, one ice-cream, one cake, one apple and if I'm home with all the things but tomato, She will not talk about how I brought things for her but how I was unable to bring the tomato. What does that mean? Out of each and every moment, if you keep trying to find out only the loopholes and not the filled-up spaces, you are searching for not love but hatred and in return what you will get? Love? definitely not. After all, Love is not any kind of bussiness, its a feeling to be observed in each and every loophole. Love is not getting in return some thing. I didnt love her for getting something from her. What Love want? Only love in return. That is the only thing I wanted. Nothing else.

well god will definitely help me if my love is true. I love her very much and one day she will understand the true love. God bless her, always.

Rights and Duties of a wife, what I require?

It's always an issue of what are the rights that a person belongs to. My thoughts about these things are that The rights always come when you perform your duties. If you think you want to enjoy certain rights, you must perform some duties. Without following any duties, if you think that you have all the rights against once life, then you are messing with yourself. How can you expect to enjoy rights without the duties performed. In case of a married woman, she has to perform certain duties to enjoy the rights of a wife, daughter-in-law, sister-in-law, etc.
what are those rights that you want to enjoy?
1. Right to be respected as a wife
2. Right to be enjoying all the freedom
3. Right to involve in all the family matters
4. Right to have loved by husband and all his family members
5. Right to take decisions in homely things
6. Right to interact with all the society as a daughter-in-law of a family
7. Right to quarrel with anyone in any disputes arosed.
8. Right to impose anything without previleges.
9. Right to have her all the interested protected against any other family member.
10. Certain other rights which involve her, directly or indirectly.

Well, if you want to enjoy these rights, there are certain duties to be carried out by you, then and only then you are eligible to enjoy these rights. Those duties are-
1. To love and and caress all the family members including husband
2. Respect all the family members and other socially connected people.
3. Duty to be in touch with every family member
4. To carry out day to day family and household related work
5. To keep the family intact in any disputes which are arising due to anything
6. To be a helping hand to each and every family member.
7. To discuss any personal decisions with every family members, specially the senior one.
8. To respect decisions of other family members and if there are any misunderstandings, clear them with full explanations
9. Manage your day to day work with all the care so that no one gets hurt.
10. All such other duties which involve family and which affects the family life.

These duties, when a woman performs, with whatsoever lacuna in it, then and only then she has her rights against any member. After all she has come from a different family and she has to give that much importance to the new family so that she gets noticed and understood by other family members. The wife is always a pillar of a family, and if she has certain doubts about any one, the family life gets ruined. Who else is there to look after the family? This is the most superior job for any woman to handle her new family with care and love. She gets rewarded if she is a successful woman in keeping the family intact. What a man requires from his wife? Just love and care, nothing else. This life is not so easy, its a difficult job. It's always a woman who is held responsible for a deeds of a family. Hence, The woman of a family has to be careful about all her responsibilities. Such a difficult job can not be handled by any man, man may have so much talent, so much courage to become a successful man, but it's the woman behind him who didnt let him down, handled all the family with care, managed all the ups and downs of family life.
I also required such woman in my life, she came, she quarrelled and she went back. What a pitty? The understanding nature is the most important requirement in a wife. I think that was the only thing I miss in her. Well, My love will never end for her. May god always help her in achieving all her goals, even if I'm not one of those goals.

The Incident that Shook my Life

When my parents arranged my marriage, I thought I should really concentrate on my to-be-wife. Give her all the love that I have. Well, I was a very flirty guy before marriage and had number of girlfriends. But now that the girl to whom I'm marrying has said "Yes" without knowing my background, definitely deserve my whole life and I should not betray her at any cost. I used to talk with her whole day, before marriage. It is important to know the girl with whom I'm marrying. The whole days were dedicated to her. All day only she was on my mind. I noticed that she doesnt know how to talk so I used to tell her what type of sentences she should say. I tought each and every pattern of expressing love and expected that she should react in such way. Nothing was getting in her mind. I thought that let her do what she tries, I should not force her to react in the way that I suppose she should react. She didnt used a single word about love even though some times she tried. I thought that she will learn how to express love. Sometimes I got very desperate as well as angry to hear from her how she loves me, but even by this there were no effects on her. I thought let her take her time to react. The day came when we got married. Even then, she has not a single sentence of expressing love. Well, even then I thought she will take her time. A year passed but nothing from her side happened that will express me her love. In the mean time, she kept going to her father's home. I didnt opposed her for this, as she was newly married and misses her family.

She was pregnant and it was the time, again, she should be at her father's home. It's OK. Then a girl came in my life, she would continuosly talk with me whenever I meet her. I got impressed by her thoughts and words. I used to talk with my wife daily, there were quarrels between us every two or three days. But I still loved her. The girl I used to meet kept me impressing. Once I thought, let me get what my wife cant give me, the words, the expressions, the feeling. This was definitely not good, as I already have a woman in my life as my wife and I love her very much. Once, I got so much desperate and depressed with my wife on phone, so many bad words exchanged but still she didnt told me her feelings about me. I told all such things to the girl I met, who else was there to share my feelings? Her helping hands and feelingness got me bold out. I thought so much, calculated so much, what if my wife got noticed about this? what will happen to her? How will she react? Whether she will take the responsibility of this thing? It was long battle in my mind. It happened in regular goings. I started meeting her not so often but once or twice in a week. That girl also told me that this is not right, you should not do this. But the love and sharing that I required in my life was totally not there with my wife. Even when I get angry, my wife held me responsible for all the quarrels between us. It brought me down so much. Still I kept loving her as I still love her very much.

Even though, I didnt got what I expected from my wife, I shouldn't have done this with her. She is, afterall, my wife, eventhough she doesnt love me or love me but dont talk with me on that topic, I guess. But after this much happened, as she got noticed of such things that I've done with her, betrayed her, still she is not with me, she doesnt even think that It was her responsibility of providing me the kind of love what I expected from her. I'm a lonely person now and may be for whole life. But I love my wife so much and cant forget her at any cost. Whatever may be her thoughts and feelings about me, well, she might even dont want me in her life but my feelings towards her wont change at all.
I love her very much and may god bless her with all the happiness that she requires.

The Dreams and The Reality of Life

It was long way back, once my cousine and I was sitting down the road, thinking about how would be our married life? It was then that I said him that there are so many friends and followers who always keep me asking about their career and other life things. What if my to-be-wife is not upto the mark? What if she will not keep my status in the society?
After my marriage, It was a misterious dream that didnt came true. I thought that atleast she will give me her love. that was also a kind of dream. I always kept screaming for her love and love touched words. She kept going to her father's home. I didnt told her that I want you near me, always. I thought she will understand one day, what I feel about her. But her stay at her father's home kept on increasing, 10 days, 15 days, 1 month, 4 months, 6 months and now from last eight months she's not near me. What a pitty. Well, my love would have less power and because of which she is not near me. Only two things that I wanted from her for which I tolerated all her wantings, whether I like or dislike. Didnt even complained about her useless needs just for two things - one, keep me loving, stay near me and two - keep my family intact.
And, all of a sudden, she started screaming at my family members, my father, my mother. It was a heartbreaking incident for me, I even tolerated this, atleast she is staying with me. That even didnt last longer and she left me for one and only reason that you should live with me without your family. Is this the day for which my parents arranged my marriage? She says I cheated with her, What a husband could do? In two and half years marriage, I completed all her needs and wills, and I just wanted some lovely words from her, is this so costly? I begged nearly every week, just talk with me how you feel about my love. Not a single word, "I love You" - I started hating these three words, coz, these are the only words she kept saying every time when I ask her to say something about love. No other words, no other feelings shared, no other lovely things, just "I love you". Atleast, this is not the way to express love.
I even tolerated this, but what about my family? They didnt even asked you a single glass of water. They didnt treated you as a slave. You were the queen of our family. Then what they required? Just a careness and nothing else. But you didnt gave even this to them. Then what are the duties of a wife - atleast, what are the duties of an Indian wife?
Well, all the days are not same, hoping that this all would get settled. I still love her and one day she will be mine forever.

first meeting 9th september
this is the day when we met first time at her home. it was the luckiest day of my life (i though at that time). Some time later she also told me that this day was luckiest for her. No doubt, nowadays she thinks this day as the worst day of her life. how it is changed? well who knows who is responsible? But every girl, atleast in India, thinks that love and marriage are the same thing. Just like in love where you are only with your lover, keep meeting each other, loving, caring, churning with life, all these things come only to you and your lover. But, after marriage, Its not only you and your wife or husband, but whole family is a part of marriage, hence you need to keep control and watch on each and every member. Here comes the turning point. The girl again thinks that there are only two persons married - husband and wife. But marriage is not that much smaller thing. Marriage is the bonding of two families together. The girl always wants her parents but bother even to talk with her in-laws. She thinks that only she is the centre of all the things and husband should always keep attention on her and no other person. What her duties are? She should keep intact the family where she has come. In this way she could live happily. But here comes the problem of nearly every Indian newly married person. He cant concentrate on his work and daily hectic schedule. There are daily matters in house also which have to be handled by the spouse but no choice. Marriage becomes problem. Love gets lost. No one tries to adjust and rethink about each other. And at this point the girl gets apart. This is the time when the girls parents should guide her. But, if they are also convinced by her that she is suffering then there is no way out. The couple breaks apart without any hesitation. Well, in this condition also I love and keep loving her but now she thinks I dont care about her and dont love her. Who is there to tell her that I STILL LOVE HER AND WILL LOVE HER ALWAYS.